Andy Schleck leaves the Vuelta today just 88K into a 204K mountain stage! According to Andy he hasn't been able to eat anything ever since "Vino" Vinokourov gave him an energy bar in stage 7. Poisoning is suspected, but nothing can be proven as you can't exactly "dust for vomit" (Spinal Tap) Could the villainous Vino have done such a reprehensible thing to our young Andy just weeks before Worlds? And could Andy have been so naive as to have accepted "candy from this strange(dude)?"
Vino could not be reached for comment. Something fishy about a superstar cyclist who protects his Twitter updates if you ask me!
I mean I do and everything, but I'm just a regular kind of person and all and who really wants to see my tweets anyway?
He did say this to Cycling News "Jak sie Masz" which apparently means go Eff yourself in Kazakh. Vino is from Kazakhstan, BTW, the world's largest exporter of potassium. Could the potassium cartel be involved in this nefarious scheme to thwart the Universe's Best
Question for the reader: what is one of the main ingredients in energy bars? Potassium!