He is the fastest man in the world (for some reason #s 1 and 2 make me want to bang my head against the wall.)
He worships the ground that Erik Zabel treads upon...bleegggh!
He got all Emo when he heard Big George was going to BMC next year. Yeah right...now he won't have the most awesomest best leadout dude in the biz working for him anymore. We know you are emotionless Mr. Man from Mann!
He has an antagonistic relationship with Mr. Lovelylocks, crash your race car in Monaco, Filippo Pozzato. Who can't love this permed, frosted, italian speed freak?
Just look at him.
He just plain wins too much. Kind of takes away the fun for me. It's like "oh Cav's racing- might as well just watch "How it's Made."
He's British and even my British friend doesn't like him. That's gotta say something about his character. I have no idea what that something is, but something.
He got pissed at my boy Wiggo when he went out and got trashed after winning a track event at the 'lympics. Deal with it sonny boy. Just because Wiggo is your countryman doesn't mean he has to put down the Jim Beam for you!
Yeah Yeah I know I'm trash talking too. He can come over here if he wants me to get all up in his grill! I'll take him on head to head with My Surley- bells, cards in spokes and all! You just name the day Mr. Cavendish. I'll be ready!
Saxo Bank’s Jens Voigt has a novel suggestion to keep Cavendish from winning more than one stage. “How about he wins the first stage tomorrow, and then takes the motorbike, jumps on it and keeps riding route 66. “ said Voigt as we learned that the winner of the first stage gets a Buell 1125R motorcycle. “How about that?”
Andy Schleck leaves the Vuelta today just 88K into a 204K mountain stage! According to Andy he hasn't been able to eat anything ever since "Vino" Vinokourov gave him an energy bar in stage 7. Poisoning is suspected, but nothing can be proven as you can't exactly "dust for vomit" (Spinal Tap) Could the villainous Vino have done such a reprehensible thing to our young Andy just weeks before Worlds? And could Andy have been so naive as to have accepted "candy from this strange(dude)?"
Vino could not be reached for comment. Something fishy about a superstar cyclist who protects his Twitter updates if you ask me!
I mean I do and everything, but I'm just a regular kind of person and all and who really wants to see my tweets anyway?
He did say this to Cycling News "Jak sie Masz" which apparently means go Eff yourself in Kazakh. Vino is from Kazakhstan, BTW, the world's largest exporter of potassium. Could the potassium cartel be involved in this nefarious scheme to thwart the Universe's Best
Question for the reader: what is one of the main ingredients in energy bars? Potassium!
Yes Lars Boom the man of the Golden Mullet is knocking my argyle socks off with his performance in the Vuelta. He's got the bike handling skills of a chanpion Cross rider AND the power of a GC contender. I'm floored. Yes, today's stage (4) was total carnage, a literal meat grinder! BUT, Boom Boom is used to that from not only Spring Classics, BUT from his incredible Cyclocross skills!
Put it this way: Jens Voigt has pure power, right? And Danny MacAskill has serious bike handling skills, right? Well if those two had a baby, it would be LARS BOOM! It would also be really weird if those two had a baby, not to mention the identity issues associated with having 2 dads.
The power of the mullet!!!!!!! Feel bad for Chris Horner. What a crap year he's had, eh?
That crash at the roundabout took out EVERYBODY! Unbelievable.
PS: I think the mullet is only for 'Cross season as Boom Boom seems to be sans mullet by my estimation for the Vuelta.
Now you must listen to this song in honor of mullet man of the Vuelta 2009---LARS BOOM!!!