Whose Gloucester video is better?

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Please help Sansen develop FAQ about cycling


Submit your lame, ludicrous, yet meaningful questions here and Sansen will consult her crystal ball on the summer solstice and provide answers.

2009 San Sebastián Live Video, Route, Preview, Teams, Results, Photos

Check it yo

2009 San Sebastián Live Video, Route, Preview, Teams, Results, Photos

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Flippin' Hilarious interview with the Bros Schleck

Anke found this one. Hilarious! Who knew Andy's middle name was Raymond? I didn't. Didn't catch Frank's middle name.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Dear AC, Save the Drama for Your Mama

Oh boy- I am going to be getting some hatin' for this post, but what should be said will be said, even if I shouldn't say it. Alberto Contador has lost his flavor for this fan girl. I am talking personality-wise, not bike-riding-wise. I have to admit that although I knew of the tensions on Team Borat, I assumed that most were caused by Mr. Super Ego Armstrong and his Guinea Pig Rescuing minion who is married to Odessa Gunn. Now, however, the other shoe has dropped. Literally, it fell off my foot and now one of the pugs is chewing on it.

Now you can look at the news from Cyclingnews and Velonews and draw some conclusions and ask some questions. First off, is this just sensasionalist sensationalism about the LA dispute with the sensational Spaniard? Is this just part two of the Lance dog and pony show? Or does Contador truly hate the man from Texas (and his own team)? After all he did deny Kloden's chance of a podium position as he played with the lovely Schleck brothers on the Col de la Colombière. Was this an innocent act on his part? Or, an attempt at world domination and screwing his own team?

Did you know that the human brain is not fully developed until age 25? I did. Let's all remember that AC is a youngster at age 26. The kid dropped out of high school to ride his bike for god's sake, so I think it's safe to say he's probably about as sharp as a bowling ball. So, like the Manx Mouth, he probably does engage mouth before brain is in gear on occasion. But if you look at this article of the press conference that was translated by someone WHO ACTUALLY SPEAKS SPANISH you might detect a different tone. Still not exactly a glowing recommendation of Lance, but not the "CONTADOR RIPS LANCE (a new arsehole)!" headlines of some other news sources.

However, and I can't back this with any evidence so don't ask me to. I clearly remember a Versus interview with Conty at the beginning of the Tour where he said that Lance was his hero growing up. So, if my memory is correct, then we can indeed accuse Contador of lying. Liar Liar Pants on Fire! Additionally, you can watch this vid of senile Sir Phil to get his insights on Contador's psychological make-up. Sir Phil works for the FBI in the off season as a serial killer profiler. The gist is that in Sir Phil's opinion (which is Lance biased and would marry Lance if Lance would have him) Contador is not a team player who races for himself.

Personally, I have lost some respect for Contador not so much because of all the soap opera drama. More so because I don't really like his squeaky voice. As for getting all PO'd because the silly French played the Danish National Anthem. Hey- laugh it off. They're dumb (and mean). Call me a bigot if you must, but What Danish rider could have possibly won? It was a stupid blunder, yes. But in the grand scheme of things- come on Alberto, you've won 4 grand tours. We all concede that as a cyclist you totally rock, so deal with it.

To wrap things up; this little soap opera is quite boring, but what the hey I might as well throw my 3 cents in. After all, it is my blog. Andy Schleck remains the best bike racer in the universe! Only reason he didn't get first is because he was trying to help his bro, Frankie.

Also, any truth to the rumors I heard wafting around the bike shop yesterday that Andy might join team Cheap Electronics that break in a week? I can't imagine the brothers separating and I can't imagine him riding in a support role for any one any more. But who knows in the world of intrigue that is cycling???? BTW- didn't Andy look cute on the podium?

Friday, July 24, 2009


Sirotti via SteepHill

Everybody must get Schlecked.
So did you hear that Cuddles might sign on with Radio Shack? Will he be Lance's bitch do you think? Sorry to see the mouth from Manx won today. Even though he has NO CHANCE of getting green in Paris Podium. Also, some moron radio announcer called him the fastest man in the world after today's stage. HELLO! Who is wearing Green right now and who will be wearing green (with no stain- despite Cav's snarkiness) in Paris??? Thor- the God of Thunder- that's who!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Stage 16- OMG! We lost Jens and someone killed Kenny!

Stage 17 Rain, Fatigue, and Mountains
First off, Cadel still sucks (really really really) Can’t wait to hear what the whiny excuse will be. Andy the Magnificent is currently in 5th (I imagine this will change when Lancey pops in the mountains today.) Wiggo- the biggest surprise of the tour for this fan girl is in 3d! That is one funny dude as well as a bloke (as my friend Helen might say if she said such things) who can ride a bike! Brother Frank is not far behind and VDV went back up to top 10! VDV is sooo the dude. He basically says he’ll support Wiggo for the podium. Now that is a team player.
Holy Cow the Green Jersey of the God of Thunder is with the leaders. Go Thor. Keep that Green Jersey out of the greedy, nasty hands of Cav- whose latest waaaa is this “ If you win that Green Jersey (Thor) in France it will have a stain on it.” What a baby. Dude the officials’ word is the word. Handle it, learn from it, and don’t cry about it. Hah- Thor is killing the front in stage 17. It would take a natural disaster, act of god, or serious crash to put the Manx Mouth back into green. But as Thor himself is a god I highly doubt any of those things will happen.
OMG- Sir Phil said the heli shot looking down looked like a “giant maggot.” He is seriously losing it. Help find a cure for alzheimers, donate to Levibot’s guinea pig rescue farm. Wonder how he feeds the rodents with only one hand. Actually feel a bit sorry for “The ‘Bot” he’s had a rough coupla years Tour-wise.
Word on the street is that Astana will be in shambles next year. Johan and the traveling Lanceberries will take their show on the road under a new name new sponsor. Hmmmmm….. Wonder what Vino thinks of this?
Tragedy struck Team SexyBank yesterday. The heart of the team, Jens Voigt, crashed out. A nasty spill that left him with wicked road rash, a broken cheekbone, and possible intercranial trauma. His team mates say he’s doing OK considering. In an interview yestrday some dumb ass reporter got Andy S. right after the race and immediately said. “ Great day for you, right Andy?” Andy’s response: “It was a horrible day dumb ass- (that was me by the way who said that) we lost Jens you idiot. (me again)”
Quote of the week: LA “ No one wanted George in yellow more than me.” Yo Lance! What’s the difference between you and god? When god wakes up in the morning, he doesn’t think he’s you! George might have wanted to see George in yellow more than you. LA also says that Big George isn’t talking to any one since the day he missed yellow by 5 sec. Let me splain you something, Lance. Maybe George is a pro who understands how competitions work. Maybe he just doesn’t want to talk to YOU, Lance Armstrong.
News Flash! Kenny Van Hummel has quit the Tour. He’s been in last place since like the first day. Today, However, he also crashed. Hope he’s OK. Those bastards killed Kenny! Hope he took out a few shloogs on the way down.

More on whining: Don’t get me wrong I love and respect Carlos Sastre. BUT…….How can he possibly (with a straight face and in good conscience) be complaining that the press isn’t giving him enough coverage and/or respect as the defending champion? His performance thus far has made his name…..basically a non sequitar (sp?) Today, he seems to be desperately trying to claw his way back into contention. Yesterday it was kind of funny when Sirs Paul and Phil kept calling the group off the back (the group I fondly call- THE LOSERS) as the Sastre and Cadel group. Even though Sastre wasn’t even in that group. Yet more proof that the British commentating duo are getting to be….. let’s say….. a few sandwiches short of a complete picnic.
Now I see Andy and VDV at the back of the main group. Uh oh! Frankie seems to be having the better day of the bros. Frank attacks! I wish he wouldn’t constantly keep looking over his shoulder. First of all, given his record, he’ll probably crash. Second, he has to look right in the mug of Lance. Actually maybe that’s a good thing. Frank will sprint away in horror. Unless he wants Lance to tweet something for him. VDV is dropping off the back. Totally bummer. Andy just passed AC! He saw Wiggo and LA almost crash into each other and took advantage of the sitch and took off! Woot (sorry Helen) I knew the boy was playing possum. Unfortunately, I think Wiggo may have cracked. Come on Wiggo! VDV is sticking with him- trying to get him to bridge the gap between their group and the Schlecksters! VDV is a champ! The Garmin boys are about 35 sec back before the descent and then the final climb. What a dilemma….. Guess I’ll stick with my Schlecks even though the Garmin love is still strong! Tomorrow- the ITT will decide. I think my Schlecks are a bit leery of Wiggo and others in the ITT. Also, they’re a bit unsure of their own TT abilities. Wiggo is on Lance’s wheel now, trying to bridge the gap. Knew Lance was good for something. Thanks Lance.
OMG- Sir Phil just said “Lance is like a spring ready to pounce.” Who knew springs could pounce? I thought they just kind of went boing! He also just said “the four leaders are being chased by the four chasers.” Wow- think about that- it’s profound, really.Back to the Schlecks. Both have that Schlecky grin (or maybe a grimace of pain) that we have grown to know and love as they dance up the mountain.
On a final note in this stream of consciousness- Schlecks ruled the day- Wiggo has some time to make up tomorrow. AC is still pretty firmly in yellow. And finally, CADEL STILL SUCKS KANGAROO KNOBS!

Stage 15 Wiggo is rocking the house

Please bear with my stream of consciousness.

So I finally have access to some live visual coverage of le Tour. Just in time for Stage 16. Le Grand and le Petit St. Bernard- first time this route has been used since 19-thirty-flippin-nine. As Sir Phil says “ It’s no walk in Chicago.” The final descent could be serious carnage. 99 miles- Andy is in white- Alberto is in yellow- Lance has basically quit (quitter) Even though Sir Paul of Sherwood just said that as LA “comes down the mountain watch out- kapow!” Is he saying LA is going to crash????? Or are he and Sir Phil still holding on to a shred of hope that LA can pull it off? Pffft!
Wiggo is truly a wild card in this here race! Who would have thought a dude used to flinging other dudes on a track could conquer these mountains with such strength and panache! Not to mention that he is a seriously funny dude. Apparently when team Garmin took a helicopter ride over the course yesterday, DZ was terrified. Wiggo’s comments like” We’re going down- Engine one is hit!” apparently didn’t alleviate DZ’s fears. Apparently he shat his trousers. Thanks god for DZ Nuts!
Still can’t believe the crap Garmin received for attacking on the day Big George was virtual yellow. Don’t get me wrong I totally heart George, but he’s a big boy- a pro- he knows how things roll. And after all is this pee wee soccer where “everyone wins” or is this a flippin’ competition??????? I actually received some hate mail at the VDV fan club site. By the way- Steve from Montana- you are an idiot.
As I have been relying on Twitter while in the back woods of Maine my thanks go to TdF Blog ittdf and helsy for keeping me in the loop. I must admit that my evil heart filled with glee and mirth when I learned of the Manx Mouth’s DQ the other day for pushing the God of Thunder! After saying “If the others want to win, they better stop racing like juniors.” It was a delight to see Mr. “I don’t have any cycling heroes” act like a 12 year old in the spring and get a thorough spanking from Thor!
Well let the stage begin! I will give my unbiased, truthful (as always) commentary in such a way as to offend no one.
Strong men Big Jens and Fab Fab appear to be trying to get some of their boys into the lead before the first ascent. Martin Maaskant (sp?) is right there with them.
Just saw an interview with squeaky voice cuddles. He thinks his mountain bike skills will help him make up the like 58 minutes he’s currently behind. Now they’re talking to Wiggo who says that he and VDV are going to work together and whoever has a good day and good legs will go for it. Wiggo attributes to his success to not being a lazy track rider anymore. No offense to Track riders- swear to goodness Wiggo said it- not me!
Holy Crap! 5 Cols tomorrow! Shazamm! Bye Bye Cav- Hello Andy! Just had my 1st Andy sighting in the peloton. Heard that Frank has marked this stage as his. Let’s see how that goes. Here’s the question of the day: How many water bottles can Sparticus fit inside his kit for the boys? What a fine job fab fab is doing supporting the Schlecksters in the mountains. Jensie’s face also says it all. The dude is an animal. I totally heart him!
Whoa- just saw a Japanese flag on the side of the road. Are they lost? Oh no that’s right there is still a Japanese rider in the race. Watching Pellozati now. I just can’t take my eyes away from that hair. He really looks like a poodle- don’t you think?
Quote of the day: Crashy crasherton (who I love)Frank Schleck on his crash last year on these very mountains- “I’m not going to say I would have won the stage that day, but I would have.” Broken English or too many hits on the head in crashes? You decide.
Also, do not discount Christian Vande Velde who is currently 12th in the GC. I’ve read some naysayers evil chatter that he is done now, but as he said “ look for some re-shuffling of the GC in the next couple of days!” Yes he had a not so great day, but the boy can ride mountains with the best. My dream is 2 Garmins on the podium or maybe a Schleck, a Garmin, and AC. Or maybe 2 Schlecks and a Garmin. I have a lot of dreams.
Here we go up the second climb (which is actually harder IMHO) Good to see a peloton led by SexyBank and Garmin, getting really sick of looking at Astana and listening to Phil and Paul sing the praises of the team from the land of Borat. Saw my second favorite hair boy (Pippo) leading the auto bus off the back. I really can’t decide if I like the frosted Jeri curls of Pozzato and Pelozatti or the mullet wearers. Both are equally bizarre and horrifying yet fascinating. Equally fascinating is the assortment of schloogs on the mountains. I think I just saw a dude dressed like a bunny rabbit draped in an Australian flag. I strongly believe that the gendarmes should be given permission to taser, shoot, or smack these idiots who run alongside the poor riders.
Woohoo! 21 miles to go and the lead group is led by Schlecks Wiggo and VDV! Lance just launched by Frank and Christian. Oh No! Please let his legs pop! Lance to the rescue for AC. Damn it!
OUCH! Nasty Crash for Big Jensie. Please let him be OK. Astana was probably sticking pins in the SexyBank and Garmin VooDoo dolls.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Now that's a mullet!

Whoa Karpets' Carpet is really rocking. It was blowing in the wind on the Col d'Aspin!

Teams Petition Against Race Radio Ban | Cyclingnews.com

Teams Petition Against Race Radio Ban | Cyclingnews.com

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Gotta love Big Jens Voigt's views! How about 2 days without our chamois and our shorts, cleats on our pedals? Make us wear sneakers. How about that?

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Choose one and either make it your totem or your voo doo doll

Pixel People- check out Cadel's eyebrows!!!!! LMAO! Fabulous looks a little scraggly in this pic. Tommeke seems to be sporting a mohawk. Notice how the two on the end need to be placed as far apart as pixelly possible?

I predict an Astana implosion tomorrow. Anyone want to take that bet? Levi and Lance are going to try to start bitch slapping Alberto. WWJD? What would Johan do?

Go Schlecks! Go VDV! Take advantage of the unteamlymanship of the Astana roster. What we've seen so far is a thinly veiled demonstration of teamwork. Who will choose sides and what sides will be chosen? and what will the team do while Alberto dances to Victory at Ventoux and the Champs?

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Heaven stage 5 TDF Finish

Heaven... I'm in heaven,
And my heart beats so that I can hardly speak.
And I seem to find the happiness I seek,
When we're out together dancing cheek to cheek.

Heaven... I'm in heaven,
And the cares that hung around me through the week,
Seem to vanish like a gambler's lucky streak,
When we're out together dancing cheek to cheek.

Oh, I love to climb a mountain,
And to reach the highest peak.
But it doesn't thrill me half as much
As dancing cheek to cheek.

Yes I am happy Voeckler won and here's why-

  1. Cav did not win. I wish I could find a picture of the little green leprechaun. His kit was hilarious today. For those of you who care "Green is his yellow." Additionally, gotta love this Cav quote, "If they want to win then they shouldn't race like juniors."
  2. This should really be number 1, but I'm too lazy to switch it up. Voeckler deserves it! He stayed in that break from the get go. Chapeau to Voeckler!

2. I always love it when someone in the break wins. It's like a hundred to one I ever get to see that.
3. The French deserved it I guess. I mean, how long has it been since a French dude won a stage of their very own Tour?
4. It's almost Bastille Day which I understand is a very important holiday in Frenchland, so what the hey- throw them some cake and let them eat it.
5. Cav did not win.

Allez Andy! Allez VDV! Allez Alberto!

How bummed was Ben Stiller yesterday?

Could he have been any less enthusiastic? I mean for real. On the podium, Stiller could have been a bit more cordial. IMHO. He's a Lance Lover- what can I say.

Anger Fest 2009!

Well boys and girls, I guess that the other 19 teams and we fangirls and boys should just pack it up and go home. This d-bag....errrr reporter from the SF Chronical says so. From here on it's going to be the Lance show. Dale Robertson wrote this article full of smacky smacktalk. My rants, raves, analysis, cutting wit, and comments will be in ANGRY, SCREAMING CAPITAL LETTERS!

(07-08) 04:00 PDT Montpelier, France -- If you think the Tour de France is only about who wears the yellow jersey on the Champs Elysées on July 26, that all the other weird stuff is just details, then you need to know the race came to a sudden end Tuesday for 19 of the 20 teams after just four days and less than 300 miles of pedaling. (REALLY MR. ROBERTSON? SO IN YOUR INESTIMABLE OPINION WE SHOULD ALL STOP WATCHING? I HATE TO BREAK THIS TO YOU, BUT THE TOUR AIN'T OVER TIL IT'S OVER! THERE IS A LOT THAT CAN HAPPEN BETWEEN NOW AND THE CHAMPS THAT COULD SERIOUSLY HARSH YOUR LANCE BUZZ AND CAUSE YOUR TESTICLES TO RECEDE INTO YOUR SACROILIAC!)

Yep, c'est tout. That's all, folks. (YOU'RE AN IDIOT!)

The war is over for everybody except Astana, the team of Lance Armstrong, which won Tuesday's team time trial. (THE BATTLE BETWEEN GOOD AND EVIL HAS JUST BEGUN! CONTADOR CAN WIN BECAUSE I LIKE HIM, BUT LANCE?- YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!)

Armstrong erased almost all of his 40-second deficit to leader Fabian Cancellara of Switzerland in the fourth stage. (SO DID HIS TEAMMATES MORON!)

So what about Aussie Cadel Evans, second in the last two Tours? He's riding for exercise now. (WELL THAT'S TRUE) Ditto defending champion Carlos Sastre (DON'T MAKE ME COME OVER THERE DUDE!) and the Giro d'Italia winner Denis Menchov.

"We did the maximum," said Armstrong, who's now less than three-tenths of a second out of the yellow jersey for an eighth summer,(AND IT'S GONNA STAY THAT WAY, DUDE) a decade after he wore it for the first time.

His Astana mates are lined up in third (Alberto Contador) (EXCUSE ME MR. KNOW IT ALL- CONTADOR IS THE CAPTAIN OF THE TEAM), fourth (Andréas Klöden) and fifth place (Santa Rosa resident Levi Leipheimer) behind him, separated by a mere 38 seconds.

Sorting out which one gets to stand in the middle is going to make for a breathlessly riveting last two weeks. Armstrong, the seven-time winner going for an eighth after returning from a 31/2-year retirement, predicted it's going to come down to who crosses the finish line atop Mont Ventoux July 25, (OH SO EVEN LANCE DOESN'T THINK IT'S OVER! NO SHIT DUMBASS! SO WHO ARE YOU TO CALL IT QUITS NOW. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO GO BACK TO COMMENTATING ON BEACH VOLLEYBALL OR SOMETHING?)the day before the ceremonial final ride into Paris.

So he told Contador that Tuesday's mission was total unity(YEAH RIGHT!) and perfect harmony. In other words, forget what had happened Monday (LOOK INTO MY EYES- FORGET MONDAY- FORGET MONDAY- YOU WILL DO EVERYTHING I TELL YOU TO DO. WHEN YOU WAKE UP YOU WILL BE MY SERVANT) - when Armstrong caught his young Astana friend napping and left him choking on his dust. And forget what's about to happen, a certain mano-a-mano battle between the two of them in the Pyrénées mountains.

"My point to Alberto was, 'Let's ride perfect and make this race almost impossible to win for others,' " Armstrong said. "I think we can say we accomplished that. The Tour is finished for some riders. I won't go into names. No disrespect, but it's difficult to make up those times."

Andy and Franck Schlecks(PLEASE AT LEAST DON'T ADVERTISEYOUR IDIOCY BY SPELLING THEIR LAST NAME INCORRECTLY), Cancellara's Saxo Bank teammates, are 1:41 and 2:17 behind. Sastre is at 2:44 and Rabobank's Menchov, who had another almost comically bad day by crashing into a barrier, is at 3:52.

Perhaps if they were chasing only Armstrong or only Contador, maybe a miracle could happen. But the chances that both Armstrong and Contador - never mind Klöden and Leipheimer - will come unglued are slim indeed.

Armstrong leads Contador by 19 seconds, but the issue of the team's leadership remains unsettled nonetheless. Contador, 26, the 2007 Tour winner, is conceding nothing.

Once the hard climbing begins in earnest, Armstrong and Contador can't both be protected by the Astana mates. Who gets protected, plus when and how, is the intriguing challenge confronting Astana strategist Johan Bruyneel going forward.

The unusual circumstances are going to make for some extremely interesting team dinners in the days to come. Armstrong admitted missing out on the yellow was "a little bit of a disappointment" but conceded the team couldn't have executed its game plan any better.

The 37-year-old Armstrong even offered a public apology Tuesday to Sastre and former U.S. Postal Service teammate Christian Vande Velde, who finished fifth last year, for calling the 2008 race outcome "a joke" because of its weakened field.

"I was disrespectful to Carlos Sastre and Christian Vande Velde and guys who were a presence in last year's Tour," Armstrong said. "That was not correct. This is not easy. It won't be easy if I'm lucky enough to win again. (NOW THAT IS CERTAINLY A HALF-ASSED APOLOGY- I'D LIKE TO SEE A BUNCH OF FLOWERS AND MAYBE A CARD ATTACHED TO IT)

"Today, I'm realistic. I've got both feet on the ground. I'm not going to get last, but it won't be like 2004, 2005, 2001. It's going to be a hell of a lot harder than I expected. That's as honest as I can say it."

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Riders Unhappy With Tour’s TTT Course | Cyclingnews.com

Riders Unhappy With Tour’s TTT Course | Cyclingnews.com

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Some fine Garmin butts and DZ levitating! WTF??

They kicked ass today! Pun intended.

How does he do that?

It's On!

Whew.....I almost had to pull out the Lance VooDoo doll again. He was this close (as indicated above by Fabulous) to being in yellow today. Please ....if Johan, Levi, Lance and co. keep on saying there is no infighting on the team- I'm here to tell you they are big fat liars!

Look at the picture at the bottom of the pictures and take a good long looky look at the expression on Sir Lancelot's face. Thanks for bringing this to my attention Helen. Then look at the expression on Contadorus Rex's face! "Every picture tells a story- don't it?"

Now for those of you who still think that Andy S. can't TT- all I have to say is shut your piehole! He is currently 20th in the GC with only 4 stages (2 OF WHICH WERE TTs) So nananananana to you. Just wait until they hit the Pyrenees.

Of course I am also delighted that my Argyles kicked ass with a 5 MAN SQUAD in today's TTT! This was not planned. I don't care what anyone says. I've been hearing on the internet chatter that they planned to drop Farrar, Pate, Dean, and Maaskant. That would be way to risky and insane to be planned. My boys are powerhouses though and came steaming through. We now have 4 Garmin guys in top 15! Wiggo, DZ, Millar, and VDV! Go Garmin!

photo: Allen Lim

photo: Cycling News can't find credit

Look at the man in the upper right and then at the man in the bottom left. Analyze, compare, contrast, evaluate. Which one looks pissed off to you? And BTW- does the dude to LA's left look kind of like Rob Lowe or what?

On to the Crashes du jour:

Next, the crashes! They were spectacular and many in what Sir Phil coined "The Australian Corner." Smiley Menchov went down BAM! BBox Kapow! 4 dudes into the ditch. And the incompetent Silence Cadel Team had a nice crash as well. I couldn't embed it because it's in some weird foreign site that I can't figure out, but if you want you can see it on steephill.tv.

Farrar and Dean talk Lead Out

TYLER & JULIAN DISCUSS LEAD OUTS from Nigel Dick on Vimeo.


Monday, July 6, 2009

For Sansen

I want all of you ladies to look at this pic of Sir Phil long and hard before you go to sleep tonight. I know you will love the cyclist tan lines he's sporting. Good god! Not right!

Sunday, July 5, 2009

I swears to God Versus has created a new TDF Jersey

OK- so last I checked there were four jerseys up for grabs at le Tour. White- Best Young Rider, Yellow-Overall Leader, Green- Sprinter. All seen above on the lovely Andy, Carlos and Oscarito Freire. Below is the coveted KOM (king of the Mountains) or Polka Dot Jersey. Cool, right? I can wrap my head around this. Precedent has been set, etc, etc.

But NOOOOOOO! Sir Phil, Sir Paul and Versus have invented a 5th Jersey. I call it the Lance Bullseye. I swear to god. Phil just said that the jersey represents the position of Nancy Lancy. OMG! Somebody just shoot me now- please! See Below.

Glad to see VDV is still hanging strong in the GC, as is boy wonder Andy Schleck. Frank the crasher lived up to his reputation in today's stage, but got back on the bike. I hear conflicting reports. He injured his shoulder and he is OK. Which is it? 

Bummed Manx Mouth beat Tyler (awesome argyle) Farrar in the sprint. CSC and Garmin are looking good. My prediction that infighting will begin very soon within Team Astana which will probably break them. Sorry Alberto- you work for a bunch of assholes. Vino was especially obnoxious yesterday. Who is he like the emperor of Kazakhstan or something? 

Anywho- Let me please introduce you to the official Sir Lance TdF Jersey. Think it'll be on the podium every day?

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Pic of the day

photo: Allen Lim

Gotta love DZ with his blinders and earbuds on. He's like a flippin horse. All I need to see is a carrot.

 The race is on girls! I believe all of our young velociraptors had a very good showing. You def can't knock Andy boy's impressive 18th in the opening TT. But man it was hard not to concentrate on those twig arms of his. I'm seriously afraid Cuddles might snap one in half. Speaking of Cuddles, he came in 5th...blegh. Looked like he had a bit of a mechanical at the start. Maybe his mechanics can't stand him either and stuck a bananapeel in his ring or something.

The Lance show was certainly impressive. I counted 35 mentions in the first 6 minutes of Versus coverage. Then my head exploded and I felt better. Were there other riders on the course during Lance's TT? The way I figure it is this; he wanted to go first so he could have all day to tweet and give interviews about how it's not about the bike or something. 

Very happy with the Argyles. Wiggo in 3d! Woot!  DZ and DM 13 and 14 respectively and Christian in 17th. I'm here to tell you VDV is going to fly under the radar until the time is ripe. Tomorrow is a sprinter's stage so they say. But looking at the profile there seem to be a few climbs in there that the likes of Mouth from Mann won't like. hee hee.

Here's to Tour de France 2009 and the current Maillot Jeune wearer Fabulous Cancellara!

Garmin is all set up and ready to go!

All set up and ready to go for the Prologue. on Twitpic
Photo: Allen Lim this AM via Twitter. May the gods look favorably on this quest of good versus evil. Anyone care to join me in the VDV chatroom at 9ish EST? 

Friday, July 3, 2009

Start times for the last 41 riders stage 1 TdF 2009

Don't ask me why they don't have the whole list yet, but here's what I found so far:

Stage 1 ITT start times and order for the last 41 riders

16:00 Van Hummel 16:17 Armstrong 16:34 Farrar 16:35 Posthuma 16:36 Larsson 16:37 Leipheimer 16:52 Grabsch 16:54 Millar 16:55 Freire 17:38 Zubeldia
17:46 Bruseghin 17:52 Cavendish 17:55 Gesink 17:56 F. Schleck 18:04 Devolder 18:08 Pereiro 18:14 Zabriskie 18:17 Kloeden 18:24 Boonen 18:28 Iván Gutiérrez
18:30    Nibali 18:32    Rogers 18:34    Vande Velde 18:35    Clement 18:36    A. Schleck 18:39    Hushovd 18:41:30 Gerdemann 18:43    Moreau 18:44:30 Karpets 18:46    Chavanel
18:52    Sánchez 18:55    Pellizotti 18:56:30 Efimkin 18:58    Kirchen 18:59:30 Astarloza 19:01    Wiggins 19:02:30 Menchov 19:04    Cancellara 19:05:30 Contador 19:07    Evans 19:08:30 Sastre

Smiley and Cuddles

Steephill presents some team presentation pictures of the presenters. Look how Smiley Menchov is. And notice how unimproved Cadel's looks are from last year. Do you think he puts Rogaine on his eyebrows? 

Anybody have start times for tomorrow's ITT? I can't find them anywhere. All I know is that VDV is starting at 6:34 and is #51 and that Wiggo is starting at 6:54. Help needed here!

Maggie's Fantasy Team for TdF

If you don't agree with me- keep your mouth shut so I don't have to open the can!
  1. Alberto Contador (duh- and you know those tacky Astana duds will be coming off the minute he hits the Champs!)
  2. Frandy Schleck (both brothers count as one so my team gets an extra rider :P)
  3. Christian Vande Velde (but of course)
  4. Jens F-ing A Voigt (he will be there to offer wisdom and sometimes just to yell)
  5. Big George Hincapie (Can't have a serious team without 14 time TdF rider Big George)
  6. Tyler Farrar (He will be going for the Sprinter's Jersey and will smash the mouth from Mann over and over again.)
  7. Carlos Sastre (Loving the "dope" new Cervelo TT Kit)
  8. Dave Zabriskie (Really- how can you have a team without DZ? He can sing gospel songs to the boys as they trudge their way through the Alps.)
  9. Yaroslav Popovych ( I just so heart Poppo- he makes me laugh and is "strong like bull." He and Jensie will be the backbone, foundation, keystone, what have you, of my fantasy team.)