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Thursday, August 21, 2008

The Pro Pelaton (Fans, and Reporters) are Safe!


So- I heard from Helen that Cadel isn't racing in The Vuelta this year. What a tragedy. I was hoping to watch him suck wheel, not attack (except reporters and fans), and come in 2nd again.

Well- I decided to go to the horse's mouth (cuddles.com) to hear what Mr. Evans had to say for himself. Here's what I learned. Please don't mind my commentary (which will be in yellow.)

  1. OOOHHH! Chiara has posted some "Fab Photos from Beijing." Be still my heart. Can't wait to open that page.
  2. "Cadel has just sent a message" What is he on a desert island? "to say he is about to have his knee checked by a specialist to determine his race program for the rest of the season." OK- he slipped on some beer, I don't know about you, but I've slipped in beer in the past. It sucks, but you move on with your life. "He has been receiving constant treatment" Constant Treatment??? Whatever. "and his knee is recovering well" WHEW! That's a relief! "and, now he can sleep on his left side for the first time since his crash in the Tour!" Does that sentence really need an exclamation point? Does anyone really care?  

 "Blah blah blah about the Tour of Poland Sept 15-21" Who cares? "But this will depend on the advice he receives from the specialist" Psychotherapist? Now here comes the part I love. "It has been a LONG season and Cadel doesn't have any specific goals for the remainder of the season." Hasn't it been a LONG season for everyone? So what's new there? Did he have any goals in the season up to this point? "Check back soon for another diary" Yes Sansen- the man has a DIARY. "from Cadel and a race program for the rest of the year." Oh Yeah- I'll be getting right on that. Right after a finish reading Chiara's diary- NOT!

Here's a quick reminder of the deceptive nature of Cuddles from cyclingnews.com.

"After the Olympic TT in which the Australian finished 5th, it was disclosed that he had suffered a ruptured ACL. HE INJURED HIMSELF WHEN HE WAS CELEBRATING HIS SECOND-PLACE FINISH IN THE TOUR DE FRANCE, AN INJURY WHICH AT FIRST WAS DENIED."

Liar Liar Pants on Fire! What a doughball.

4 comments:

Helen said...

Pmsl! Oh that site is genius PR work for Cuddles. Though obviously very few of us actually buy into it!
There's a ton of people who've had a longer season than him! Of the big names i can think of Valverde has done waaay more than him! And he's doing the Vuelta. I like how it says he has no ambitions, doesn't he want to aim for second in something? It's what he always achieves, no?

Maggie said...

I'm telling you- he is getting into victim mode- so that he can blame everyone but himself for his failures and soon to happen meltdowns.

Helen said...

Getting into victim mode? He's always been in it as far as i can see, the whinges are nothing new, but just more documented now he's a 'bigger rider'. But yeah i'm sick of the excuses, the dramatics. A quiet, nice Vuelta where the riders hug lots, smile lots, pretend to be massive rivals up mountains but are eager to congratulate one another as soon as they cross the line [the Spanish are buggers for that!] and a stage where they all go topless in the name of evening up their tans for charity [well i can dream...]. But yep, no-one bitching and whining that it's not their fault they're crap and a psychopath. I just hope he can at least save the massive meltdown for next year's tour so my predictions can happen.

sansen said...

...and a stage where they all go topless in the name of evening up their tans for charity...

Oh yeah! It'd do wonders for Contador's tan line if those pics from Curacao were telling anything. And just think, Mr Evans would not be participating in your dream this year either.