Whose Gloucester video is better?

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Australian Cyclists who DO Rock!




From Top to Bottom: Phil Anderson, Simon Gerrans, Robbie McEwen, Stuart O'Grady. These guys (unlike Cadel Evans) Have proven that they rock. See below for the reasons that they rock. Please understand they I have presented these men in this order for purely alphabetical reasons. (It's not me it's my OCD.) Also, a gentle reminder to any person who has nothing better to do than to read this silly blog; although I do try to base all of my entries on fact, there is some poetic license thrown in. Remember this site's primary mission is to demonstrate why Andy Schleck rocks, and Cadel Evans does not. 

Phil Anderson:
  1. Phillip Warren Anderson is an American Physicist who made huge contributions in the fields of localization, antiferromagnetism, and high temperature superconductivity. (WHOOPS! WRONG PHIL ANDERSON!) Truly sorry, as Phil Anderson is probably the  greatest Australian cyclist.
  2. Philip Grant Anderson was born in 1958 and holds the unique honor of being the first non-European cyclist to hold the Yellow Jersey of the Tour de France.
  3. Nicknames: "Skippy" and "Dr. Teeth." Hmmmm......Wonder if that has anything to do with the history of cannibalism in the Tour?
  4. Phil Came away from the 1982 Tour de France with the White Jersey for Best Young Rider. (JUST LIKE ANDY SCHLECK DID THIS YEAR! Yay!)
  5. Phil Anderson was the highest placed Australian finisher of le Tour until Cadel Evans' 2nd place finish in 2007. (what a coincidence- Cadel came in 2nd again this year. Always a bridesmaid, never a bride.  Poor Cadel.)
  6. Phil had 2 career Stage wins in the Tour de France. Go Phil!

Simon Gerrans:
  1. Twenty-eight years old, but is not too proud to wear braces. Cool!
  2. Won Stage 15 in the 2008 Tour de France. Go Simon!
  3. No indications to date of anger management issues (unlike you know who.)
  4. 2008 Australian Olympic Team. Good luck Simon! Stick with Stuart O'Grady and you'll be fine.
Robbie McEwen:
  1. Nicknamed "Pocket Rocket" Because of his spectacular sprint finishes. Robbies flies, Cadel trudges.
  2. Robbie is 36-years-old and is not only fast, but nice. I cannot find anything to register on the Anger-Ometer for Robbie. 
  3. Triple winner of the Tour de France's Sprinter's Classification. 
  4. He was a BMX rider before switching to Road Racing. This is cool because the whole BMX culture is cool. Radical Dude!
  5. Sprints to a Stage 1 2007 Tour Win from out of nowhere. This is after he was in a wreck 25k from the finish. I attribute this to his BMX days. This guy understands pain and can suck it up (unlike some people whose "legs hurt and are cramping"- you know who.)
  6. Robbie has ridden the Tour 11 times and has racked up 12 Stage wins. This dude is solid. 
Stuart O'Grady:
  1. Rides on Team CSC. Stuart gets double points for that smart career move. CSC is a powerhouse that will dominate professional cycling at least until Andy Schleck's contact expires in 2010.
  2. O'Grady is 34-years-old and is nicknamed "Stuey." Hmmmm.......Perhaps another cannibal -STEW-y?  Must investigate further.
  3. 2007 Paris-Roubaix winner. Now this is a HUGE accomplishment. That course is unbelievably difficult. It's like Alpe D'Huez times ten!
  4. 2008 Australian Olympic Cycling Team. Stuey PLEASE keep Simon away from Cadel Evans! The kid has potential. We don't want Cadel's bad habits to spread to the young racers.
  5. O'Grady has won 2 stages in the Tour de France. Go Stuey!
  6.  Stuart comes from a cycling family. His dad competed in the 1964 Olympics.
  7. Seems like a really nice, solid guy. 
In conclusion, there are many Australian Cyclists who DO rock. Unfortunately, Cadel Evans is not one of them.

No comments: